It’s out! It’s out today! I’m SO BLOODY EXCITED!
I won’t lie, this book was not an easy delivery. When I first sat down to write a non-I Heart book, I thought it would be, quite frankly, a piece of piss. I had loads of ideas! It would take mere days to get them onto paper! But um, no. The first two drafts, as my editors would probably not tell you out of politeness, were utter shite. It took me far too long to realise that I was trying so hard not to write an I Heart book, not to write Angela, that what I was actually writing was rubbish.
Rachel was whiney and difficult, Matthew was mean, Emelie was just rubbish. And so, with a head full of flu, a heart full of Christmas and a bloodstream full of Sudafed, I started rewriting. As in, from the beginning. And inside three weeks, I had a burgeoning meth addiction*, no concept of day or night and a new book.
Unfortunately, by this time it was too late for me to feel OK about it. Once the book had been delivered, typeset, copyedited and printed, it was out of my hands and on its way to the bookshops. As I’ve mentioned here (too many times), the weeks and days before a book comes out are terrifying to me. I can’t remember what I wrote. I think some of it was funny. Pretty sure some of it wasn’t. I tried not to make it clichéd or hackneyed but I also tried not to sleep for three weeks and that’s never a good idea.
And today, at last, it’s with you. Which means I’m in the final throes of shitting bricks while I wait to see how it charts, if it charts, and what the reviews will be like and whether or not my publisher will ever let me write another book as long as I live. I hope they do, I haven’t got a job anymore. Anyway, my rattling on over. I really, really hope you like this book. The mental three weeks I spent pulling it into shape were some of the trickiest but most rewarding I’ve spent as a writer thus far (I’m a writer, I say thus) and there were parts of the book I remember being very proud of. And parts I remember glossing over. And parts I remember thinking ‘they’ll never let me leave that in’. But they did. Have fun trying to guess which bits.
*Did you know you can make meth out of Sudafed? They told me in the chemist after I had to show my driving license to buy some. This all started to make sense when I had heart palpitations on the floor of the changing room in on Christmas eve and had to call my friend to come and get me. Nothing to do with the Marc by Marc Jacobs collection, honest injun.